Monday, February 24, 2014

Cleaning house

Figuratively speaking,
I am cleaning house;
Of so called friends.

Yesterday a close "friend" of mine,
Ended our friendship,
Because she doesn't agree with my decisions.

It made me realize that,
My friends are dropping like flies.
And I can't do anything about it.

It just shows,
They weren't my friends,
To begin with.

So my first step in cleaning house,
Was I deleted like 60 people,
Off of my Facebook.

Then I went through my phone,
And deleted a ton of numbers.
Mostly people who've used me.

I'm fuckin over it,
I'm tired of having fake friends,
And I'm tired of being used.

So in other news,
It's eating disorder awareness week.
So I changed my profile pic on Facebook,
To the NEDA ribbon.

I asked other people to do the same,
Only two of my friends did so.
Which was sweet of them,

I just wish that eating disorders,
Got the awareness that they deserve.
People don't realize how serious the are.

I'm getting sick,
Thanks to my youngest,
Who gave T and I his cold.

I'm thinking of getting a PO Box,
So I can start writing and receiving mail,
From all of you beautiful ladies.

If you would like to be pen pals with me,
Shoot me an email,
That would be so exciting.

I hope you're all doing well,
Lots of love,
XOXO Katie

4 comments:

  1. Good for you! Sometimes friendships end; it's just the way things are. If they don't agree with your decisions or at least are supportive, drop them.

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  2. I took losing friends really hard and I did everything I could to keep them. It was devastating when a couple of my friends dropped off and I was so angry. I rationalized it, made it my fault, made it their fault, anything. The pain didn't subside. I reconnected with a few and didn't with one or two. Looking back, I realized that when they said they didn't agree with my choices it wasn't just that, it was because I was toxic. Maybe that's not how they thought about it necessarily but I was. I wasn't growing and I was stuck in my ED and insecurities. There's only so much people can do for you before it's coming at their expense and I became dead weight. It didn't matter that I was painfully loyal or loved them. I was causing them emotional pain by always worrying about me or being unable to help me. At that point you're the bad friend. I don't know your situation but I just can empathize from both sides. It's never easy but maybe after you do some growing and self-exploration you'll reconnect. If not, then you weren't friends after all. I think it's good you cleaned things out because no one deserves to be treated that way. I love your PO Box idea too. Take care dear. Lots of love.

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  3. Great decision, sometimes cleaning is the rightest answer!

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  4. It's amazing how many people you can think you're friends with, when they aren't. I'm glad you cleaned out your friend list. You deserve only the best people in your life.
    I wasn't able to put that eating disorder awareness picture As my profile pic, because I was on my iPod, but I did share it. I agree that more people need to be aware of eating disorders
    Take care. Xx

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