Surgery

Well today is the day of my surgery to have cysts removed from my ovaries again. I can't eat or drink anything since midnight. Easy diet, right? I'm still weighing in at 88lbs this morning. I'm going to be calling EDC here in a few to see how things are playing out as far as getting me in goes. The more and more I think about treatment, I can see that silver lining. I want to live. I want to be able to go back to Tennessee next year and see everyone and be healthy. I no longer want to be scared of food. My intake for yesterday was only 320cal even knowing I probably wasn't going to eat all day today. My surgery isn't until 1:30pm. Then after surgery, I'm not going to want to eat anyway. I had this same surgery back in March and it took me a bit longer to recover from it. That was 22lbs ago. I'm nervous as to how my body is going to react this time. My doctor doesn't seem too concerned, which I guess is good. The sun is shining beautiful today. I am going to try to enjoy as much of it as possible before I go in. I want Starbucks. That sounds absolutely amazing. It's funny; on a daily basis, I don't mind skipping meals or not getting enough to drink, but when I'm told I'm not aloud to, I want to eat everything in sight. Last night I had quite the urge to binge. I removed myself from the kitchen though so I wouldn't do it. I ended up getting nauseous last night and tossed up most of my dinner, and not even on purpose. I am thinking about taking a nap before my surgery, even though I will be sleeping most of the afternoon and evening. I'm just trying to keep my mind of all the yummy food in the kitchen and calm my nervous. I found a quote the other day that I'm going to end this post with: Journey: The bend in the road is not the end of the road, unless you refuse to take the turn. I found this very inspiring, I hope you do too. Much love.
XOXO Katie