I allowed myself some food

I was able to make it to 475cal yesterday. That's the most I have had on this whole trip. I even enjoyed myself some chocolate and didn't feel too guilty afterwards. I went up to 90lbs this morning. You know, despite my gain and the step in the right direction, I can't help but that panic feeling deep down when I see those numbers go up. But I talked myself through it and looked at the writing on my scale and realize that the number on there doesn't define me. It doesn't tell me how much family and friends love me or my self worth. It's quite chilly in Tennessee this morning. Foggy. But quiet. I should be packing because we are leaving the hotel at 11am this morning. Last night I got to go fishing on the Tennessee river. We didn't catch anything, and I was quite cold, but I very much enjoyed myself. Yesterday was an all around good day. A friend of mine put on the cupid shuffle on his stereo, and I was the first one up there getting down. I even got my dad up there. It was quite amusing. It's on video on all our facebooks haha. I'm sad about leaving this small town because I will miss my family, and I will miss all my new friends. But we will keep in contact hopefully. Tonight we are headed to Nashville so I can go to the country hall of fame. Something I wanted to do last year but we didn't have the time. My coffee tastes especially fantastic today. Probably because I'm a bit cold. Ana is preventing me from eating breakfast at the moment, but I know that I should eat something before we leave. I got to talk to my oldest on the phone last night. Made me cry. I miss my kids so much. I'm going to finish my packing, although I'm dreading it. I also have to balance my checkbook so I can see how much I have left for the remaining of the trip. Thank you all for the support and comments on yesterdays blog and following me on my journey towards recovery despite the set backs I will have. Much love.
XOXO Katie