The reason for all of this? T and I decided to seperate last week. I packed the boys and myself up and moved in with a friend and her kids. I love T with all my heart but we were fighting all of the time and we realized we had fallen out of love with each other.
So currently we are taking time to reflect on our relationship and I'm taking this time to find myself. I don't know who I am outside of our relationship. I also want to be a better mom and so I'm also taking this time to work on being a better mom for my boys.
I am terrified of relapsing because of all of this going on. But I know if I do, then there is no chance of us working through things.
I tried resorting to cutting because I didn't want to fall back into my ed. But I failed at that as well. I'm just a mess and I've got so much stress in my life. Smoking more than a pack a day is killing my breathing. But oh well. I'm sorry that I've been so absent. I miss you all so much and I hope that you're all doing well. Lots of love.
XOXO Katie
Oh love, it makes me so sad to read this. I don't know what to say. I just can't believe it. I'm sorry you've turned to purging and self-harm, but I can understand why. Please keep fighting, if only for your boys' sake. You're in my thoughts Katie dear. Sending lots of love and positive energy your way <3 xxxx
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that things are rough right now. I really wish you wouldn't cut, but that would make me hypocrite and also I understand why you're doing it. Please please don't fall back into your ED. You have friends and family who love you, reach out to them for support and let them help you. Do it for your kids, I know you have the strength in you. Xx <3
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